Why My Reading Has Been Suffering…
This has been driving me crazy recently. I couldn’t pinpoint the issue for so long. My TBR pile is stacked high and within it, there are a few I’m curious to dive into already but nothing was sticking. Lately, I’ve been busy with a long to-do list. By the time I get to bed (LATE) I knew attempting to read then would only make me suffer big time when I woke up the next day…
So what’s going on? I thought. My Goodreads challenge meter is telling me I’m 2 books behind schedule which makes me gasp and weep inside. With so many YA books being adapted into movies that are coming out just this year, I’ve been catching up on those reads I haven’t gotten to yet.
Remember when I told you all I was going to read ‘If I Stay’? So I’ve been trying to get on that for two weeks now. I picked it up ten different times. I even started reading it at the salon and I was really liking the narration so far…but since then, I hadn’t picked it back up. I’ve sensed the hesitation and have wondered,
“What the heck is wrong with me?!”
Then, the light bulb.
I’ve been in this “funk”. This isn’t a post where I’m going to get all raw and vulnerable with you all about my current issues–nope, we’re not doing that, but I will briefly explain that I have been feeling icky, grouchy, and overwhelmed with life lately.
Once I realized my emotional state, I realized why I had been avoiding reading ‘If I Stay’…I’m not emotionally ready to do this:
This happened to me when reading ‘The Fault in Our Stars’. When I first picked up Fault, I was beyond excited for it. Unfortunately, my family and me were going through a family death which means, I was an emotional mess and cancer was involved so…definitely not the best book to dive into during that time. So I read it…slowly. It took me a while to finish it because I knew it was meant to rip my heart out by the end but back then, I didn’t know all the spoilers, so I was prepared while simultaneously completely unprepared.
‘If I Stay’ feels the same way. I know it’s going to rip my heart but don’t know what to expect. I think emotionally, I’m just not in the right place for this read right now. I’ve been avoiding it while equally wanting to read it which has caused me to procrastinate and not read anything…which is not good because when I go too long without reading something, my heart feels it’s missing component that gives it life.
So I am tossing all self-imposed pressures of reading certain books out the window and just gonna pick something up I might just enjoy–not too many feels. Epic Reads mentioned a Reboot by Amy Tintera read-a-thon before it’s sequel, Rebel releases on May 12th. I have had Reboot on my TBR shelf for a while now which made me think,
“Hmm, why not? Bad-ass dystopian with a different take on Zombies…yeah, I’m down with that.”
So that’s what I’m hoping will pull me out of this reading funk.