Writing…Oh, Yeah, It’s Back On, Baby!
…took long enough-Ha!
I’m such an extremist. I’m either all Reading or all Writing. I need to learn happy mediums. The last four months I would say, have been me waiting. And waiting…wondering when the juices to complete my synopsis would hit me. Here I was trying to be a good girl and not start the drafting process till after I had organized the plot for both books.
For those who don’t know, I had began almost nine months ago with a concept for a book. It was going to be a trilogy, it was in dual perspectives, Dystopian, Post-Apocalyptic, etc, etc. For months, I wrote the first draft of this first concept and was almost done. I mapped out the last few chapters and was at 67K words.
Then…*breathes remembering* long story short, it wasn’t working. It didn’t have a proper ending. Book one had an ending, but the series couldn’t work. The concept wasn’t tight enough and I never figured out the full story. When it came time to answer those questions…I was mortified–for myself–that it wasn’t going to work.
I chucked the entire draft out the window. *single tear* But in the end, it was most definitely for the best! Soon, a more tight concept I liked even better came about. Months of working it out, other things fell into place and I was excited. I had all of Act One figured, and soon I had an idea for how Book one would end.
I came to the conclusion that this story could be told in one POV, and that it would be a “duology”-made up literary term. *grins*
Now I had much of the skeleton and could have began writing but I said,
No! Don’t. Touch. That. Manuscript. Woman.
Yes, I talk to myself, a lot and in that manner. So! I waited…and procrastinated…and waited…and nothing. Nothing was coming. Four months later, anxiety began to set. I wasn’t liking this. I was letting time pass and not progressing in this project I determined to finish by this year.I was letting myself stress too much. I was going into “you are failing” mode, which is never productive or healthy, but in fact, I was beginning to feel like I was failing at something I’m so passionate about.
So I immersed myself to binge reading. I was reading…ALL. THE. TIME. Which I was more than okay with. I caught up on so much reading and it was wonderful. I’m addicted again and must remember to lift my head up every once in a while, be social and say hello to at least the people in my household. Outsiders? Pfft! Who cares about being courteous or social with them. *snickers*
Then…one fateful evening…after watching this movie I have never heard of that in fact, was an adaptation from a book, it came to me. The movie featured Saoirse Ronan who I have dubbed: Every Dystopian/Post Apocalyptic authors go-to gal for casting. She’s astonishingly brilliant for someone so young and has been able to maintain it as she grows up. Anywho, the movie is called “How I Live Now”.
I may never say this again and almost feel ashamed to say it now but after reading reviews of the book–once I found out it was a book first–I think I prefer remaining ignorant to it and only knowing of the movies existence.
*pots loudly crash on the floor, clinking and clanking*
That’s horrible, I would never condone such a statement but the fact of the matter is, that the sensitive issues within the movie are amplified in the book. We have the first cousins falling in love scenario and taking that relationship all the way. I mean, at least it’s cousins and not a “Flowers in the Attic” brother and sister scenario, so it’s easier to swallow somewhat. This was the norm, many a years ago, especially in England. i.e. Elizabethan, Victorian, Regency eras.
Once, I got past that part, I really, truly enjoyed the movie. I thought the main characters journey was real and beautiful. Here you have this bratty, fifteen year old American from New York, shipped off to England, by force, to live with her aunt and cousins, in the English country. She’s foul mouthed, has a substance issue relating to an eating disorder and definitely has issues, mentally. She puts up walls and acts like a total brat when she first arrives. Instantly, she’s mesmerized by the older of the three kids. Eventually, they’re abandoned by the aunt who leaves for buisness, and the forbidden love affair that doesn’t seem to bother the other two cousins, occurs. Then, WW3 hits England. War changes everything. The girls are separated from the boys and shipped off to opposite locations to participate in war-surviving efforts through hard labor.
The promise made when separated was to get away and come back here–home. Our main character grows up. She faces the realities of war and how war brings out the worst in many people. She slowly becomes more maternal, less selfish and her instinct is to get home. Get to him. Make it out alive with her little cousin, who relies on her now.
I thought the end of the movie was absolutely beautiful, thinking of this teenager, putting herself aside, demonstrating true love by selflessly giving of herself to serve those she loves. It’s “how I live now” she says in the end, and I loved it.
Any way, this was supposed to be about me writing and I’m gushing about this movie. Ha ha ha. Throughout the movie, I found myself reaching for my notepad and jotting down random ideas that came to me. By the end of the movie, I was processing that beautiful ending and cinematography shot and it all hit me at once. I reached over to my writing bag, grabbed my notebook and jotted frantically the idea for the entire two books.
Next, I told myself to sleep on it. I was gushing with hype and emotion. Sleep on it and come “morning” (I was up late, meaning I wasn’t going to be up by morning, probably–nightowl syndrome) go over it all with a sound mind.
I was so excited the next day. I had it. It was finally here. I went back and grabbed my trusty plot/outline board which I had abandoned, and filled it up with all the next stuff. Bitter sweet taking off the first concept index cards I still had hanging on there.
I spent the day organzing the synopsis and finalizaing all my ideas. Next day, the day I had been waiting for…DRAFTING! Actually writing the story now!
Now, I’m all writing again and my books are pouting puppy faces at me. I’m trying to figure out a new schedule. Since I’m writing late afternoons, early evening, late into the night (my once reading time), I’ trying to schedule my reading time with my doctor’s mandated hour of sun outdoors a day regiment. (taking care of some health issues currently) The silver lining? I have all this time to take advantage and write this book!
My mother walks upstairs and catches me here (above image), laughing.
“Every day you have a different office”
I laughed. I raid different parts of the house, different days and claim them as my office. Today, I’m here. The view?
I love all the high ceiling windows that let in all this brilliant sunlight. I’m nocturnal but love open, bright spaces with natural light…go figure.
So that’s my update. I’m sure I’ll be switching towards “Writing-Talk” mode more than Book Talk but will still try to get some Book Talks out there. I have a few I could already write from my last three reads. See when I get those done.
Wish me luck!
Happy Reading, Writing or whatever you do that made you happen upon my little blog.
No…I’m not British.