Why the Stalling? It Makes Sense Now

today will feature two blogs: This one from yesterday and another later inspired by a comment someone left me last night 🙂 Happy Reading…as you were


I’ve been sitting at my desk for the last hour, coaxing myself to start writing. I got all my essentials together. I set up my board, I got my coffee and water, and after a while I noticed the silence. Oh, Music, right! Put on my playlist and then sat there…and sat…starring…

I set up my dual screen of my pages and inspiration stills from movies…and I sat…and starred some more.

What the heck was wrong with me?!

I starred up at my board and thought, “am I overwhelmed by my board? So much still to write?” Then I looked at where I left off on chapter seven and…yep! You guessed it! Starred!

For the love of “vibrant green grass” what’s going on here!?

I needed to re-heat my coffee that I’ve been working on for a few hours now since I had taken most of the day to read my book; the one my niece is dieing for me to finish. I stepped out of my room to head downstairs and “Eureka!”

Warm elegant sunlit living room.

The brightly lit up hallway, with sun streaming in through the high ceiling windows, lifted my spirits all of a sudden and I literally out loud said, “Ohhhh, now I get it”. I love that my family is not phased by my random outburst. We all do it, and move on with whatever it was we were doing.

Then, a groan from within settled as I knew the solution to my problem, except this “solution” was not feasible. *scoff*

I need a change of scenery.

I need to go outdoors and greet the world, run into it, converse and see what comes. After the weekend extravaganza of the beauty show, I’ve been hibernating, regaining my livelihood. Yes, it was that crazy. Luckily when I’m not running around going to auditions, my part time job with my mother’s company allows me the comforts of working from home, or anywhere I can take a computer and access wifi. Unfortunately there’s a problem. My solution to do my hair, get dressed, pack up my book necessities and whisk myself off to another fueling location is halted drastically by the reality that…

I NEED A NEW LAPTOP! My laptop ironically is not portable. I can’t really travel with it because it has a few…issues.

My room is cozy and inspiring but after a couple of days without technically leaving it, my body is screaming for fresh air.

The other bummer is also that, this self-discovery has come just as the sun is soon to go down. I am a lover of the night. My body fights me constantly because it’s nocturnal. Sometimes though, even a nocturnal girl needs a little sunlight to revive her days.

So here I am in my conundrum. I have an iPad and a tiny mini, need nimble fingers to use, keyboard that syncs with the iPad, but when I’m in the flow, I tend to type fast and mini keyboard can’t keep up. I’m stuck!


Let us fast-forward to the next day…Today

See how zombie-like & sad she looks…yea, me by the end of last night

It’s as though my laptop went all Eagle Eye on me, reading what I had written about it and not liking what I had to say, deciding to go all bonkers and crash!
UGH! I spent all last night frustrated, almost in angry tears, pulling my hair out as it constantly beeped and flashed an error. I had plugged in mini nimble fingers keyboard to charge and it all went downhill from there! (forgive this next portion, apparently, I need to vent a little)

See, already my special laptop does not charge by itself. We replaced the battery with a new one and it wont receive it. The plug is also loose and if it pops out on its own (which it has done many a times while I was in the middle of doing something) the computer shuts off instantly. The sensor mouse pad on the laptop stopped working so I need to plug in the USB a mouse attachment.

NOW…The USB ports, both of them do not work, and are the cause of the constant beeping and error message. I restarted it. I did a system recovery of 2 days ago…nothing! Still…beeping.

I feel as crazy as Phoebe from F*R*I*E*N*D*S, that episode with the fire alarm. She woke up in the middle of the night, and it was beeping. No matter what she did, it WOULDNT.SHUT.UP! I know EXACTLY that feeling cause I have also gone through that scene! My other bestie looked it up laughing at me, but genuinely, we were hoping for some help from Phoebe on how she resolved it. RESET BUTTON!

I ran upstairs screaming like a lunatic “RESET BUTTON!” only to find out…I didn’t have a reset button. That night was full of anger, screams, tears, and laughter. Anyway, moving on…

So now, my mouse attachment wont register and I have no way of using my laptop. THANK GOD! That every night when I finish writing, I back up my novel onto a USB. (At least!)

So today’s adventures started off with me making a difficult decision. Not only for my novels sake but my livelihood. I cant do my part time job without a laptop. I travel to and fro from the office and the computer desktop I’m borrowing right now is sensitive and can’t handle the marketing documents and images I use on a daily basis…

So I went to go sell, the most valuable thing I own (beside my car which isn’t that much more valuable) my Fender Sonoran blue acoustic electric guitar…moment of silence as I show you how purr-tty she is:

185572_10150264939367611_1503135_n 205863_10150390152289768_151687_n

OK, ok, I need to stop venting with all these personal, I’m sure, you-dont-care details…

So as if my change-scenery foiled plan wasn’t any more obvious, there was a cherry-on-top that made the whole dilemma much more adventurous.

So yes…back to the point which started this blog in the first place.

If you’re sitting at your writing space feeling stuck; not cause the words aren’t there, you just feel…stuck, then perhaps it’s time to change your scenery!

Go somewhere with your portable writing device ( Napoleon Dynamite: “luckyyyyy”) that brings you a great sigh as if taking in fresh air that courses through your body…and sit down, then…begin writing again.

I’m sure, all drama aside, if I would have done so, much more writing would have spewed onto my pages. I’m almost sure of it because remembering that feeling of stepping out of my room and getting caressed by those sun rays, how it refueled my senses…oh yea, definitely would have benefited me.

So that’s a wrap on that. Wish me luck today, this weekend as the hunt for money to get a new laptop ASAP continues.

I will take advantage, using this computer to post my other blog idea I mentioned in the beginning! Happy writing!

Happy Reading, Living, Loving!

<3, Des


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